Because of water, I could win the office superlative for “most obnoxious.” I lug my half gallon water bottle around with me, swinging it around like a small purse. I often have a 14-inch metal straw to complement its portly silhouette. If you are the coworker of mine, you’ve most likely seen this toddler size water cooler clutched in the hand of mine before you see me. It truly has that significant of a presence.
Of course, you will find the side effects of drinking this much water. I am always getting up to pee. And I am constantly talking about just how I’ve to stand up to pee! But I am extremely hydrated after drinking approximately 1.5 to two gallons of water for 8 hours because of this massive, fifteen dollars dollar water holding contraption that I bought off of Amazon Prime. It’s Big Gulp-gone-Goop goodness.
We understand the facts about the benefits of water consumption so I am not gonna repeat them. All that you have to understand is the fact that in case you are not hydrated, the body of yours is going to become a desert and blow away love sand in the wind. Google the before and after photos of individuals who switch from drinking very little water to a gallon of water – the results are wild. I feel like a pink cherub from a Michelangelo painting. I feel sexy like Naomi Campbell’s runway walk.
Additionally, I am not buying those pathetic disposable plastic water bottles and then throw them out after the day. (Not killing the planet or perhaps pleasing the capitalist overlords.) I am not the loser filling up ten mugs or perhaps pint-size paper cups that congregate into a minyan at my keyboard. (That ‘s both crowded! and cumbersome) Small water containers of any type are a hindrance to hydration: a person can’t be lubricated by the miracle that we know as water when they are constantly getting up to fill up a water bottle or perhaps a cup.
The supersize water jug is life-changing. I keep one at the desk of mine, and I am sipping through its straw as I type this. I take a hearty gulp and I will feel the water wake me up. I am not as hungry as I normally am. I have not had a strange, unhealthy bulk ordered office snack. My lips are soft and pillowy, like teenage Angelina Jolie circa Hackers. Of course, I have become an H2O glugging freak. But I am an H2O glugging freak with really clear skin.